Evil Harry
by werewolfbride
Summary: What if that night where Harry was nearly killed...NEVER HAPPENED! The story of voldemort taking in Harry to be his evil apprentice. Lots of laughs, love and flashbacks. ENJOY!
1. Chapter 1: Halloween

17/09/2006 03:25:00

Disclaimer: Zelda and The Luna Lady do not own Harry Potter. If we did this would have happened already!

Voldemort had several thoughts as he lay there in his evil lair that night deciding what to do.

A: invite a couple of death eater pals over for a cocktail or two

B: Look at some prophecies

Or C: Go on a killing rampage

After much thought Voldemort decided to look up some prophecies before he went on a killing rampage.

Then he remembered a prophecy he heard about James and Lily potter's son Harry. It said that Harry and his soul mate Ginny Weasley put together would be the most powerful people in the wizarding world. So before long Voldemort had set out for Lily and James' house to kill Harry.

Voldemort burst open the door and prowled around the house ,screaming '_Crucio!'_at Lily and James as they tried to bar the door that led to Harry's room.

"AVADA KED.. "

" Voldie!" a little boy with shaggy black hair ran towards Voldemort and began to hug his knees. The little boy gazed up at him with bright green eyes – 'please don't kill me! I be good! Mum and daddy mean! They wont let me watch charmed!"

Voldemort gazed down at Harry in amazement

'bb-uut,your Harry Potter! And you are to young to watch charmed! Unless you are evil…'

' I hate being good all the time. Mummy and Daddy say you're bad but I like you!'

Voldemort sighed " You're too small!'

' please uncle Voldie- please take me away with you!"

Voldemort looked down at Harry again as he showed him those puppy dog eyes.

"Ok, fine, just as long as you work for me"

Harry grinned and climbed on Voldemort's back as they apparated to his lair.

The next day things are not going well at Oldie Moldie's lair…

AVADA KEDAVRA!!!! Yelled voldemort.

Harry: Abracadabra!

Voldie: No you stupid child it's avada kedavra! What have I done!?!?!

Will Harry learn the Avada Kedavra curse?

Will Moldie / Voldie soften up?

Will Voldemort have a cocktail with his death eater pals?

Find out in the next chapter

Killing Ginny Weasley

By The Luna lady and Zelda

Disclaimer: Zelda and The Luna Lady do not own Harry Potter. If we did this would have happened already!

'Now my dear Harry," Said Voldemort 'I have a special treat for you"

'Do I get to crucio a death eater yet, like you did to my parents?" said Harry eagerly.

'No, my dear Harry, this is something much better" Voldemort said with an evil sneer.

'We are going to ransack the Weasley house!!!"

' Oh goodie!" Harry exclaimed then Voldemort glared at him

' What did I Tell you Harry?"

' Oh, I mean, how brilliantly evil that will be"

'Slightly better Harry me boy, Work on it"

'Yes Sir"

At The Burrow..

'It's so dark Voldie.."

'That's so they can't see us"

'ah"

' Now , we shall climb into that window over there and then we shall both _crucio_ the first person we see. Got it? do you remember the spell?'

'Yes, I have been practicing it on my death eater babysitters"

"Exellent"

As soon as Harry and Voldemort climbed through the window they cast a crucio spell on nine year olds Fred on George who. They were raiding the fridge even though the Weasley family had just finished their dinner (two minutes ago!).

Then as the death eaters marched upstairs, Voldemort gave Harry a pep talk

'now Harry If you go up the stairs and turn left you will see a white door covered in blue butterflies." "real butterflies?" interrupted harry "Yes! This is Ginny Weasley's room. Now Harry I want you to practice your crucio on her while I deal with the parents'

Alright said Harry , and he toddled up the stairs jostling the death eaters as he went.

Harry turned the door handle and tried to get in (the butterflies were getting tangled in his hair). He was about to practice his crucio spell when he looked at Ginny properly for the first time in his short life.

He was completely dumbstruck . All he could say was 'I can't kill you, your hair is such a pretty orange'


	2. Chapter 2: Carrot hair!

21/05/2007 11:05:00

Ginny looked at Harry, mouth wide open. _(I mean, you would too if _

_some strange, cute boy your age walked into your room and stated that you were beautiful and that he couldn't kill you!)_. After the few minutes of silence, Ginny offered Harry a toy soldier to play with. He took it and they began to chat.

'What's your name?' Ginny squeaked

'Harry''

'Well, I'm going to call you messy hair'

'That's not my name!"

Ginny rolled her eyes "No, it's a nick'ame cos u have messy hair"

Harry nodded, and then his eyes lit up

"Then I'm calling you… carrot hair"

Both the children grinned simultaneously and started shouting their names at each other.

"Carrot hair! Carrot hair!"

"Messy Hair! Messy Hair!"

Then the door with butterflies swung open

'Righty ho Harry, have you killed… Huh?!'

He looked at the two children rolling around on the floor giggling, then one stopped (Ginny) , started to shiver and pointed a wary finger towards Voldie.

Harry gingerly put his arm round her and began to explain.

'Uncle Voldie can Carrot hair be my pet?"

'Harry, I already have one child- why the hell would I want two?"

At this point Harry stood up indignantly

'Because otherwise I won't help you destroy the world!'

Ginny smiled _'for a complete stranger, Messy Hair is very nice'_. She thought to herself.

Voldie sighed, scratched what was left of his head and paced fro a while.

He only snapped out of it when Ginny began to yawn.

'I give up, come on then." Voldie sighed – _'what a life I lead, all these children, don't know how muggle parents manage to love them'_he muttered under his breath. They got downstairs to find Fred and George telling a joke to a death eater. From on top of Volide's shoulder, Ginny pointed out her family.

'That's Fred and Gorge, my brothers and there's Ron'

'Who that?' Harry squeaked, pointing over to a boy stuck in a book screaming

Ginny laughed 'Percy!'

'Don't you want anyone to come with us?' Harry said looking sad

'Yes! Can Ronnie come?" Ginny squealed

Voldie sighed- _'My life is really coming to an end, how am I going to get Bella to go out with me with this lot? She'll _Crucio_ them! Maybe I could teach them the counter-curse…'_He mused

"Fine, Hop on" Voldie groaned as he apparated out of the burrow

**Later…**

'Welcome to HQ' Harry said, lavishly flailing his arms around.

Ginny laughed and Ron tittered nervously. It was a huge castle with lots of haunted objects and bubbling potion bottles. (A bit like Hogwarts- but the evil version). Voldie immediately crashed on the enormous sofa and turned on 'Charmed'. Harry jumped next to him and Ginny was sandwiched between Ron and himself. Voldie kept on making some comments on Paige's body which luckily no one heard and overall it was an enjoyable evening.


	3. Chapter 3: Dreams, Slaps and Cuteness

_**Voldie sat alone in his chair waiting. Two beautiful women emerged out of the mist. Voldie cracked an evil grin. The dark haired one and the brunette were about to reach him when one noticed the other. Then they started to slap eachother. When Voldie tried to reason they began to slap him…**_

'Ow! Ack! Bellatrix! Paige! Stop!' said Voldie flailing his arms around him. Then he finally opened his eyes. Stupid, completely stupid. It was just a dream. Just Ginny and Harry trying to wake him up. His hand ran over his cheek.

"Boy! That girl can slap hard for a two year old!" He thought.

Both Harry and Ginny were lounging on his four-poster bed, giggling at eachother ( With Ron sucking his thumb on the very end of the bed). Harry was (as it seemed) imitating Voldie doing his little 'arm dance'. Ginny was laughing at Harry and He was getting so carried away trying to please her, that he fell off the bed. Voldie just sat there as Ginny gracefully slid off the bed to join him.

The little ginger toddler, crawled up to the bawling Harry and began to question him.

'Where does it hurt?' Ginny asked tentatively

Harry whimpered, pointing to his left cheek

'Do you want me to kiss it better?" Ginny asked again, as if it was obvious.

Harry nodded and so Ginny planted a small kiss on Harry's left cheek. His tearstained face managed a grin and Ginny began to feel much better.

"There ya go scruffy hair!" She said proudly to him afterwards

and as Voldie followed the three out onto the dining room, all he could think was " How do you do it Harry?, How do you do it?"


	4. Chapter 4: The disatarous date

09/07/2007 13:28:00

Chapter 4: The Date

A/N: In case I didn't mention, the Lovely JKR owns ALL the characters in this fan fiction (apart form Jeeves the dementor!) Also I do not own Café noir (if it exists!)

After Voldie got out of bed, he led his 'menagerie' to the kitchen where there were death-eaters making all their food appear. Ron and Harry downed pumpkin juice and food, while Ginny picked at it delicately. Ron had begun to feel slightly more at home, but he still flinched every time anyone but Ginny tried to touch him.

They were all enjoying a silent meal when another dementor (dressed in a tux!) came in with an old fashioned phone on a silver platter.

'O most handsome, cunning, sly, but yet, evil master, the phone for you' He said in a low monotone.

'Thank you Jeeves' Voldie grumbled and held the receiver up to his ear.

' _**Hello my Dark Lord, It's Bella. Just wanted to say that I can come for the date tonight at eight. I couldn't get us a table at 'Café Noir' so I thought we could have it at your mansion. And I hope you don't mind that I bring a friend of mine. Bye!'**_

Voldemort dropped the receiver. '_A Date- at MY mansion! It's unclean and not fit for her and this so called friend of hers (please let it be Paige!), I can't cook and… oh, I forgot to mention I have three kids who are more than likely going to be cursed by her!'_

'Who's coming round for tea uncle Voldie?' Harry asked tentatively

'The Woman of my dreams who I have had a crush on for the last thirty years…' he groaned

'Can we dress up?' asked Ginny excitedly, jumping up and down.

Ron and Harry pulled faces, but Voldie smiled wryly and presented them with outfits. Ginny had a black cape and long-sleeved dress with purple and black stripy tights. The boys however were wearing little suits, which gave the impression that they were vampires. Voldie had a magnificent black cape and suit as well, which he looked very uncomfortable wearing.

'What do you think Jeeves?' said Voldie, gesturing to Ginny, Ron and Harry standing in a row.

'Splendid If I may say so myself master' Jeeves said in the same posh, English monotone.

The Castle was as clean as it was going to get bar the odd hundred cobwebs that refused to budge. Portraits were all dusted and put to sleep and the house elves made all the food and set the table. Ginny and Harry had to try to stay clean but Ron however was not attempting to move much. He had felt really lost since he had got here. He had Ginny but he sorely missed the rest of his big family.

That was all about to change for Ron Weasley. Little did he know, that the things that happened to him at the tender age of two could change everything.

The Castle doors swung open to reveal Bellatrix in a stunning red dress.

Voldie gulped.

She strutted in and following close behind her was a small girl surrounded by her dark brown curly hair hanging below her shoulders. She wore a gothic black and white dress and a satchel of books was fastened to her back.

'Hermione, come and meet the dark lord' Bellatrix barked

The little girl- Hermione edged forward and shook Voldie's bony hand.

' My name is Hermione…Gr...Black ' The girl said with an air of uncertainty in her voice.

Voldie suddenly felt sorry for her, Bellatrix probably wasn't a great mother. She excelled in other areas, such as torture, however he wasn't sure that that was a good thing for Hermione.

His train of thought was interrupted by Jeeves, who had announced that dinner was going to be in the Gaunt hall (Voldie had wanted to name one room after his mother after he turned a bit soft and sensitive) This was due to Bellatrix)

Bella flounced into the room and sat down at one edge of the long table which took up most of the room space. She sat down, like she owned the room and threw her black cape into Hermione's chest as Jeeves shooed both her and 'the other three' out. It was just he and Bella, all by

themselves.

Bella smirked- 'I didn't know you had pets too'

Voldie chuckled nervously, then he remembered who she was referring to. Then he stopped laughing like a moron and looked her directly in the eye.

'Harry, Ron and Ginny are not animals, they are well… like my children'

Bella stifled a laugh behind her big red lips.

'None of them deserve the care you supposedly give them. Do you feed them and let them go to the toilet? Do you do all that ghastly parenting stuff?'

'No of course not' Voldemort said, knowing perfectly well that he did.

Meanwhile, unbeknownst to Jeeves and the 'love birds', Ginny and Harry had found their way in under the table. Ginny came armed with crayons and glue while Harry led the way. Ginny, once fully under the table headed for Bellatrix's legs on both knees. This woman was trouble whether Voldie had a crush on her or not. She hated kids- this was bad news.

She found the crayons and drew all over Bella's cape which she took to wearing underneath her coat, which had fallen down to the floor. Ginny expressing her 'creative side' (possibly inherited from a Weasley) by writing 'I am very ugly' on the back. Harry had glued her stilettos to the floor sneakily and exchanged grimaces with Ginny (She was OK for a girl) Bellatrix Black would not know what hit her.

Hermione ran out of the room crying after Bella had shouted at her, and sat down on the a stone step, her head on her knees. Ron followed on tiptoe, He felt he wasn't up to another of Harry and Ginny's escapades. He plonked down besides her and tried to look into her eyes . She immediately turned towards him and sighed.

'I have to get away from her. She's been hurting me'

Hermione rolled up her sleeves to reveal several curse-marks.

Ron gulped. She sounded brave.

'How can I help you?' he asked softly

'You would help me? Oh! That would be so great!' She squealed excitedly giving Ron and unexpected hug. He blushed as red as his hair.

Hermione glanced behind her and then whispered something into Ron's ear. Ron looked nervous and then his face managed to crack a small grin.

Bella was tapping her 5 inch nails on the ebony wood, waiting for the first course. Voldie was trying to hold the fort. Women were much harder to understand than he figured.

She sighed again and started to further engrave into Voldie's Black table.

'_**She's going to drill into the table if Jeeves doesn't hurry up!'**_ Voldie thought. In thinking this he stood up saying

'I'm going to check on the food, so sorry for the wait'

Bella nodded absent-mindedly.

Voldie stormed into the kitchens, casting a few 'Avada Kedavras' and eventually brought out the plate himself.

'Dinner Is served beautiful Lady' He said in Jeeves' voice

Bella chuckled, then said 'What is it?'

'Rare vixen and other assorted meats' Voldie said, a sly a smile curling his lips. He knew that she would love this

However, Bella began to turn beetroot with rage

' I'm on a **NO MEAT DIET!** You fool! I thought you knew me! It seems not!"

Voldie's smile vanished as he realised his mistake,

Another screech from Bella suddenly awoke him

'My high heels! AAAAARGH! They are stuck! I hate you!'

Vixen flew directly across the table knocking Voldie over

Bella unstuck her heels with a spell. She reached fro her cape and seeing the doodles, went and slapped Voldie on the cheek

'**Ack! Why do all women slap hard!' **he said to himself

Bella headed for the door, refusing to look back, despite Voldie's pleas.

When Ginny and Harry heard this (from under the table) , they high-fived under their table. Their work was done here, Bella Black would not be coming back (yay!)

Bella flung the doors open

'Hermione! We are going now!'

She was nowhere to be found. Ron smiled to himself, that woman did not deserve a daughter like her. Now way.

After Bella left in a tantrum, Ron searched round the back, where he had let her hide. She wasn't there. Ron believed that he would never see her again.

How wrong he was.


	5. Chapter 5: The Aftermath

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters in this fic (bar Jeeves the awesome dementor) The wonderous JKR does

Evil Harry Chapter Six- Halloween

18/06/2008 09:06:00

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters in this fic (bar Jeeves the awesome dementor), the wondrous JKR does- I am so proud to live in the same country as her!

Also (for girls) - DO NOT FOLLOW ANY OF MRS WEASLEY'S (MY MADE UP) ADVICE ON MEN! IT IS PROBABLY NOT VERY ACCURATE- PLEASE NO COMMENTS ON THE RUBBISHNESS OF THE ADVICE- THANK YOU!

And thank you to all of you - especially to Miss Marauder4487 who has given me two lovely reviews :D, and to my good pal a.different.luna and my amazing beta Handy1994. This chapter is for you guys

Xxx

Zelda

_After Bella's Exit…_

Voldemort trudged back to the Mansion feeling pretty dead. He failed to find Hermione or Bella and was certainly never going to win Bellatrix's affections in the near future. He didn't want to be with any other, sexy, utterly insane Death Eater. Why couldn't things go his way, just once!

So, after what seemed like ages, Voldie found his feet staggering up the cold black marble steps, past the sleeping ginger boy.

Ron stirred slightly at the sounds of Voldie's footsteps but was still fast asleep. He then mustered all his energy and picked Ron up and consequently left him inside on the sofa, slamming the ebony doors behind him and falling flat on the floor.

Harry woke up very early that morning. He was still under the long dining table where Bellatrix and Voldie sat last evening. He grinned, remembering the look of sheer horror plastered across her pallid face. He lay back on the floor and tugged his pillow tightly- only to discover that it wasn't a pillow…

"Carrot Head?" Harry whispered into the mane of ginger on his chest.

'_Mmmmph….' _Replied Ginny, slowly lifting her head and looking into Harry's face, then recoiling with horror.

Ron woke up with tears in his eyes from lack of sleep. He had been looking for Hermione too. He kind of thought he knew her from before, but that was completely out of the question…

Sliding expertly off the sofa, He started on all fours to the kitchen. There he found Voldie draining an ornate goblet of coffee, and Jeeves, as always, waiting patiently there in his tuxedo.

"Good morning Master Riddle the second, your morning elixir and your bowl of evil-looking porridge are waiting for you". The sound of Jeeves' 'dulcet' tones echoed through the mansion as Ron drained the elixir and sat next to Voldie at the table.

"Ron, lemme… tell youuu..sumfink.." Voldie shouted into oblivion

"Women- are more trouble than they're worth. In fact, the whole feeeemale sex is a wasteey of…"

Voldie was subsequently hit on the head with a bottle, by a smug looking Jeeves. Turning to Ron, he said- "don't worry, he'll be alright- definitely back to normal in a few hours"

Ron giggled sheepishly and smiled at Jeeves. The posh dementor wasn't so scary after all.

Harry and Ginny came to the kitchen red faced, and drank their elixirs in unusual silence. This time Ron was the one talking…

"…And Jeeves just hit Uncle Voldie on the head- it was sooo funny!"

Ginny and Harry both burst out laughing, but then noticed each-other's reaction and stopped. Thoughts were rushing round and around her head.

She vividly remembered her mum talking to their friend Tonks one evening:

"_**Now, Dora, you mustn't worry one bit" said a consoling Mrs. Weasley. "One day he'll realise that you are a beautiful lovely girl - one any boy would be lucky to have" Dora was sniffling into her hankie- her hair a greyish shade of pink **_

"_**But... Mrs Weasley, how will I know that he loves me?"**_

_**Mrs Weasley straightened her apron, and sat down bedside Tonks, near the roaring fireplace. **_

"_**Well, when a boy is interested in you he will start by begin quite flustered when he is around you. Then when he is more confident with you- he might attempt to hug you or put his arm round you. Then it goes from kissing, making out and then (only do this when you are older) sleeping together. And that is when you will know that he loves you"**_

_Sleeping together. _Those two words were troubling Ginevra Weasley. She and Harry had slept under the table together all night. Did Harry love her? She wasn't sure whether she loved him. Maybe she had scared him by recoiling earlier. However she couldn't deny that she had felt safe and warm in his arms…


End file.
